++--*POLITICAL PANEL -- SHOW 2

PAUL:	I welcome back our pithy panel on 
	political culture in Newfoundland.  
	Joining me in the studio are 
	investigative journalist, Ariel 
	Flint, host of BCN's Show Trial, and 
	J. Richard Candow, noted pundit and 
	pollster.  Carl Jonson, an economist 
	at the UNSJ joins us on the line 
	this week from Kuala Lumpur.  
	Welcome all.

ALL:	Hello, Paul.

PAUL:	Well, there's a spectre haunting 
	Canada--the spectre of the extreme 
	right, I guess you'd have to say.  
	This week, inspired by goings on in 
	Ontario, our own Minister of Social 
	Services, Derm McGettigan announced 
	a Workfare Program for Canada's 
	Happy Province.

ARIEL:	Work "Camp" Program, Paul.  I mean, 
	the Mike Harris agenda looks 
	positively pink in the light of our 
	province's new scheme.
	
JR:	Give 'er, Ms. Entitlement!  Step 
	right up for another free lunch!
	
CARL:	Yummy.

ARIEL:	Plantations for the elderly to work 
	off their pensions?

JR:	It's only two days a week.  You'd 
	have them mortgage their 
	grandchildren's education, just to 
	stay alive for a few more miserable 
	years.

ARIEL:	But with the new plan, kids will 
	have to work for their education, 
	starting in Grade 1.
	
JR:	Do you want it both ways?  Try 
	thinking these things through before 
	you start yabbering.

PAUL:	Really J.R., are there no limits? 
	Surely some of the people who are 
	genuinely in need cannot work.

JR:	You're breaking my heart, Paul.  
	Because of gutless wonders like you 
	and Ariel, the program has come 
	under serious public scrutiny.
	
ARIEL:	Thankfully.  They just eliminated 
	the mandatory labour terms at Voisey 
	Bay.

PAUL:	No!  They weren't going to send them 
	to the mines!

CARL:	Sixteen tons and what do you get?

JR:	Well, it's gone now.  You can stop 
	whining.

ARIEL:	Not whining, Richard: democratic 
	opposition to a fascist mistake.
	
JR:	Elitist!  That fascist mistake is 
	the will of the people of this 
	province.
	
ARIEL:	They were never consulted.  You and 
	your spindoctor friends made sure 
	the last campaign was fought on the 
	weighty issue of highway reform.

JR:	Yes, and where were these new 
	highways heading?  To the camps.  
	That was clear to the voters.
	
ARIEL:	Well, don't expect those happy 
	voters to be happy campers.  You may 
	be in for a surprise. 
	
PAUL:	It's not my place to express an 
	opinion but ...

JR:	Then on to the next issue.

PAUL:	Oh.  Well, then, how about Canada 
	Liquidation 2000?  a shocking 
	proposal to take advantage of the 
	break-up of Canada by selling it.
	
ARIEL:	At fire sale prices.  

JR:	You're over-simplifying it Paul, 
	it's really more of a leveraged buy 
	out.  Besides a card carrying member 
	of the Parti Quebecois like yourself 
	can hardly be concerned about it.
	
PAUL:	I withdrew my membership.

ARIEL:	What about the Bloc?

PAUL:	Au revoir, Lucien.

ARIEL:	What happened?

JR:	Ya, I thought you were reaching out.

PAUL:	I just didn't understand what they 
	wanted anymore, changing the 
	question all the time.  And that guy 
	Mario Dumont that they got in bed 
	with, I don't trust him.

JR:	You're an astute judge of character 
	Paul.  He could be one of those 
	robots programmed by the CIA.
	
ARIEL:	THERE ARE NO ROBOTS!

CARL:	I met young Mr. Dumont when he was 
	head of the Liberal youth.

PAUL:	Oh yes?

CARL:	Yes.

PAUL:	And?

CARL:	Yes?

PAUL:	What did you make of him?

CARL:	Well, I don't think he's a robot.

PAUL:	No?

CARL:	No.

PAUL:	Well, good.  The Quebec situation 
	has really got me flummoxed, 
	following Jacques and the boys dance 
	their way around the issues is like 
	stepping through the looking glass. 
	It's unreal how ...

ARIEL:	Unreal?  It's a pan-national 
	delusional episode.  It's like 
	deciding to file for a divorce 
	because your lawyer tells you that 
	afterwards you'll still keep the 
	house, drive the car, see the kids 
	without paying support, and have 
	your way with the wife whenever you 
	want.
	
JR:	Hmmmmn.

ARIEL:	Like I said, Paul, delusional.
	
PAUL:	But what should we do in the face of 
	the referendum?  Keep quiet or make 
	loud noises?

JR:	Urge them to leave.  The more you 
	spurn the frog, the harder it clings 
	to your trouser leg. Whimpering 
	pepsi's ...
	
ARIEL:	I thought you said casually spurn, 
	Richard--not bate them with racist 
	slurs.

JR:	Well, maybe a delicate measure of 
	both.